40 Plus Dating

We asked a friend to tell us about her ability to attract both younger and older men at over 40. Here is what she told us.

Life is full of surprises. One of the biggest surprises that I have experienced is that both older men and younger men are attracted to me. Part of it is that I occasionally take classes at local collages and trade schools, so I have the opportunity to meet younger men.

I usually meet older men either in my gated community, at the grocery store or at work.

I also meet a lot of men I don’t care to date, but sometimes I elect to go out with either older men or younger men that I like or to whom I feel attracted. I’m not particularly interested in marriage but I do like to date interesting people and have fun.

Younger men are energetic and sometimes a lot of fun. My personal expectations are that they have a brain they are capable of using, but younger men have virtues older men lack and vice-versa. Older men have their own skill sets.

Here are some things for women over 40 and dating to look for in younger men.

1. They are often more energetic and able to perform better sexually…or not. Sex does have a learning curve and some men NEVER get it, regardless of age. It’s one of the reasons I like smarter, better-educated men. They commonly have a “try hard” attitude as well as the ready equipment.
2. Younger men are less likely to patronize a woman. I am NOT looking for someone who wants to tell me what to do and what to think.
3. Younger men are into lots of action/adventure sports like whitewater rafting, hiking, running, swimming and skiing. I don’t enjoy all of these things, but some of them are daily pursuits for me. It’s nice to meet someone who has the energy.
4. I love to cook and many young men have little contact with anyone who knows how. They really seem to appreciate my homemade cooking with a twist of healthy ingredients. It’s a big part of my life and the reason I can relate to and attract younger men. I’m leaner and stronger than many women my age.
5. Younger men often are looking to me to teach them things they don’t know. I may not be interested in being their instructor, but sometimes it can be fun.

Here are some things for women over 40 and dating to look for in older men.

1. Older men are often financially more secure than younger men. It’s not always true. Some older men have financial issues, but on the whole they are better off than some younger men.
2. They also have the advantage of having been around the block a few more times. Naïve can get boring.
3. Older men are often more self-confident and it’s fun being with someone who knows how to act in most situations.
4. Older men are less likely to be excessively attached to their electronic devices. Watching someone ignore you to play video games can get boring fast!
5. Older men like it that I like to cook, too. Older men are more likely to have health issues that make my healthy eating and cooking regimen attractive. Some men also like to cook and participate in meal preparation, too, which I really enjoy.

I’m really not looking for love at first sight. I just want to have fun and look into the possibilities. Giving your self the time to get to know people is more important than finding a relationship that might lead to marriage. Why put yourself under that much pressure?